Holy Week

Some encouragement for young families

Holy Week began yesterday. I love Holy Week. It’s challenging in a practical sense here because almost all of us serve in some capacity or another, and the number of rehearsals, services, and Masses we attend fills the week. It’s glorious because just about all of us serve in some capacity or other, and the amount of rehearsals, services, and Masses we attend fills the week.

Still, by Sunday, we are wiped.

I love that this week is an invitation to slow down and enter into the life, death, and resurrection in a personal way. When my children were younger, we would not do academic school work during this week, pausing to enter into the life of the church. I read them books about what was to come, we made an Easter Vigil notebook, first done by my good friend Alice, which helped the children stay engaged in a long Mass that happens later in the evening. We would watch Jesus of Nazareth (the Franco Zeffirelli one), which was originally a mini series, so it is conveniently broken up into four parts. Each evening we would watch one from Monday to Thursday, and it would help give the children a visual for the coming days.

When they were older, we had them watch The Passion of the Christ on Good Friday. To me, it makes clear the wages of my sin, and those are the images I call to mind when praying the Sorrowful Mysteries.

Peg doll Judas and his thirty pieces of silver

There was also a lot of cleaning, which I need to get to this week as well.

This week can seem overwhelming if you have small children. There is much to do, many places to be, and so much of it entails keeping the kids quiet. I want to encourage parents, you don’t have to do it all, and if your toddlers act like toddlers in church, it’s fine. Don’t let people make you feel bad for bringing your children to church. Just do your best and pray that God blesses all your efforts, which of course, He will.

A few years ago, I wrote an article for Seton Magazine with some very practical advice for moms during Holy Week. I called it The Homeschool Mom’s Survival Guide to Holy Week, but it is any mom’s guide. Here’s a snippet.

Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matthew 19:14)

One wonders if it occurred to any of the Apostles to add on “but only if they can sit still and behave while you are talking” to the end of that sentence.

Your Survival Guide

Keeping the wiggle contained in the marathon that is Holy Week presents a big hurdle for moms and dads. Even though we are at a point where our youngest is able to sit still and listen for the entirety of the Mass, which I’m pretty sure has more to do with “getting his chocolate donut after” than any natural piety, even the well behaved young one can experience some challenges during this rich yet arduous season.

During this week, you no sooner get home from one Mass or service than it is time to find clothes and shoes again for the next one. In between, you are trying to prepare for the coming celebration, clean the house, and carefully draw your children into both the solemnity and the beauty of what is happening. Oh, and eggs. You have to dye eggs. It’s a lot.

It can be overwhelming and can really rob Mom and Dad of the peace and joy that should accompany the celebration of the Resurrection, so I’ve developed a few strategies that may help avoid some meltdowns (I’m talking about Mom’s meltdowns) and make for a more serene week.

Peg doll Sanhedrin judging Jesus and Barabbas

Having spent many years wrestling small children in the pew and getting the stink-eye from many people for my efforts, I have a heart for parents who are in that boat and feel like it’s sinking. It’s not, you are there, you are trying, and you are heroic.

If you have a young family this week is not going to look like a quiet peaceful, enter in to the holiness kind of week that it will look like in ten or fifteen years. That is as it should be, because those children are your holy work, those souls you have been generous enough to cooperate with your creator to bring into the world and then bring into the church are your best work, your path to holiness, and the legacy of the church itself. We need you and your family in every stage of their lives, even the noisy ones. So find the matching shoes and pretty hair bows and proudly enter into the week. I will be praying for you.